Vi

Before I forget....

About a week ago, Vi was upstairs in the bathroom brushing her teeth with her hello-kitty toothbrush and my little pony toothpaste.  I think I have bought no less than 6 different kinds of big kid toothpaste, but they are all too minty or too bubble gummy according to Vi.
Anyways, she yells down to me from the upstairs bathroom, "Mom I found something disgusting in here!"  Which with two small kids and a husband it could be any number of gross things .  I yell back, "what is it?"  She says, "It's that thing that holds your boobs!"  Apparently, I had left my bra in the bathroom so I yell back, "its called a bra."  She says, "yuck."  Oh six year olds.....

Mike has been a Star Wars fan since well...forever.  He still has action figures and star cruisers  (I might have just made up star cruiser) in his parent's basement.  On the Cartoon Network there is an animated show called The Clone Wars.  Mike is also a fan of it.  There is a young Jedi girl (I think that is the correct terminology) named Ahsooka. Violet is enamoured with her & generally only wants to watch the shows Ahsooka is in.  I find the cartoon way to grown up for her, but Mike is excited she loves Stars Wars so it some how justifies her watching incredibly violent Clone War episodes like massacre blah blah and raising the dead etc . To further the love affair you have to have the merchandise! Mike bought Vi an Ahsooka action figure and Kolton an Annikan action figure which oddly came with many guns. I thought Jedi's used The Force and a light saber?  I guess light sabers were okay in the 70's, but not quite overtly violent enough for the 2012 crowd.  Ahsooka comes with a tiny little Jabba the Hut. He rides in a back pack on her back. It resembles a tiny little turd with face and hands,  also very odd.  Guns and turds-weird.
Here is what I am leading up too...... We were riding in our mini-van, Vi has the seat all the way in the back.  She yells up to the front, "Dad, what is the name of Kolton's guy?"  "Is it Connecticut?"  hehehe.  Connecticut Skywalker- so close.
Strong with Star War names, you are not, young Violet. A direct quote from Yoda.

Last but not least, my words come back to bite me.  I want to teach my kids the correct names of body parts, genitals and all.  Parenting books suggests calling them by nick names makes them seem shameful or something to be embarrassed about or whatever.   In this scenario, Violet gave Kolton her paper St. Pat's day glasses from school.  Mind you Kolton pretty much ruins any and all property of Violet's. He typically gets very frantic and runs away with it only to throw it somewhere as fast as he can, or destroy it in whatever manner he can, shredding and crumpling are very common.  Then Violet melts into a puddle of tears or screaming fit.  Vi hands Kolt the glasses and says, "If you wreck them, I will kick you in the vulva."  Wrong gender, but still better than kick him in the wee-wee, right?